★★★½

“a noir pastiche, a caper, a Pink Panther-esque rollcall of mishaps, long shadows and sharp reversals”

The chief quality of Irish bar fly Mike Malloy is right there in the title. He won’t die.

And this is a major problem for a growing band of co-conspirators in this insurance scam. Because they really need Mike Malloy to die.

Until he does, they are spending money hand over fist to fund their increasingly outlandish plots.

But Malloy is the “Rasputin of the Bronx”, downing whisky and all sorts of other wicked substances, coming back each time if not stronger then at least not dead, as he should be. A lesser man would have gone down in the first. A sober man would have realised his friends were not his friends. For example, a closer inspection would have revealed the true contents of his freebie sardine sandwich.

Not iron-bellied Mike Malloy, he of the remarkable bounce-backability, amiable stupidity, bottomless tab and drunken Irish ditties. Not Mike the Durable.

And the thing of it is, it’s all true.

Playwright and director Luke Adamson seized on the story after hearing the podcast Things Are About To Get Weird. He had to go back and check again because the story is astounding. The story is a gift.

It’s 1933 and this small-scale production leans heavily into period. There’s a jazzy soundtrack (sound designer Dan Bottomley), a sleazy air of neon, and dry ice (way too much dry ice). People say, “I tell ya” and “It’s our only shot” and a nasally “yeah” making it three syllables and two octaves.

Plotter-in-chief is Francis Pasqua (a light touch from Will Croft), with his trilby and Sam Spade narration. He is a funeral director, so he knows a lot of relevant guys. Elsewhere we have Bryan Pilkington as jovial soak Mike Malloy and Stefani Ariza as speakeasy owner Toni Marino. The pair fill out a full cast of Noo York drunk-tank archetypes with a tonal tweak here and there, having endless fun doing so.

Everything is wry up to the eyeballs – a noir pastiche, a caper, a Pink Panther-esque rollcall of mishaps, long shadows and sharp reversals.

The script wants you to laugh. There are knowing quips about import tariffs and how no-one would be stupid enough to do that again. Pantomime tiptoeing. Jokes about jugs. They are on the cusp of indulgence and the play wouldn’t suffer for their excision.

But ultimately, you’re pulled back in by Mike Malloy and his inability to die. And there’s much fun to be had re-discovering this astounding fact time and again in 80 entertaining minutes.

THE MASSIVE TRAGEDY OF MADAME BOVARY

Southwark Playhouse Borough

★★★

“a high-spirited affair that the cast dive into with relish, commitment and enviable energy”

Gustave Flaubert, the champion of realism, spent five years writing “Madame Bovary” only to find himself charged with immorality. Thankfully he was later acquitted, and the notoriety that the trial provoked accelerated the novel’s rise to bestseller status. It is now considered Flaubert’s masterpiece; one that maintains its revered place in literature (its influences have reached the likes of Marcel Proust, Virginia Woolf and James Joyce). Okay, the novel was a touch bleak, to say the least, and we all know that it ends in tragedy. John Nicholson might be exaggerating the magnitude of the misery by prefixing his retelling of the story with the word ‘massive’. And he might be missing the point by unashamedly turning it into a farcical comedy. By his own admission, Nicholson has ‘lovingly derailed’ the story. Interpret that how you will. After all, theatre is all about free expression, and this play is very free with it.

The story of the cuckolded country doctor and his frustrated, pleasure-seeking wife is turned on its head as it wields its slapstick and wry exposition with such force that the fourth wall has no chance of standing. Even a sabotaged attempt at changing the ending is allowed into the edit. The result is a stew of French and Saunders, Blackadder and Upstart Crow, with a generous side order of pantomime. It is a high-spirited affair that the cast dive into with relish, commitment and enviable energy. Georgia Nicholson, as the ruffled Madame Bovary seeking amorous adventure, is surrounded by the whirlwind threesome of Stephen Cavanagh, Ben Kernow and Darren Seed who play at least a couple of dozen other characters. The story begins at the end with Madame Bovary recounting her life story to a pair of ratcatchers who have arrived in the village of Yonville. At times it is almost like a speed run. A ‘Potted Panto’ performed by ‘The Reduced Flaubert Company’.

Buried deep in the silliness are strokes of ingenuity. Kirstie Davis’ staging is slick and precise. Beneath the mayhem there is a reliance on accuracy of movement and timing, which the actors are well practiced at. Grace Murdoch’s movement and choreography is an extended conjuring trick, albeit one that seems to have wandered in from the set of ‘The Play That Goes Wrong’. Like the jokes, the influences are manifold, and the bawdy humour does become relentless and predictable. Nevertheless, the versatility of each performer shines through as they switch characters and costume at lightning speed.

You cannot help but admire the irreverence. Their approach to Flaubert’s text is embodied when, at one point, one of the ratcatchers exclaims “you took the words out of my mouth… but in a different order… and with different words”. There is a clear echo of Eric Morecambe’s famous line brilliantly delivered to André Previn. The bravery of this company matches its tongue-in-cheek audacity. In his mausoleum in Rouen, I’m sure Flaubert must be grinning, even if it can’t quite conceal an expression of open-mouthed bemusement. Over in Southwark, the audience seem to be of a similar opinion. Between moments of bewilderment the laughs come thick and fast (though as a grin rather than the out-loud variety) in this risqué, eccentric and anarchic comedy.

THE UNKILLABLE MIKE MALLOY

Bridge House Theatre

★★★½

“a noir pastiche, a caper, a Pink Panther-esque rollcall of mishaps, long shadows and sharp reversals”

THE UNKILLABLE MIKE MALLOY

Bridge House Theatre

Reviewed on 10th July 2025

by Giles Broadbent

Photography by Cam Harle Photo

Recently reviewed by Giles:

THE UNKILLABLE MIKE MALLOY

THE UNKILLABLE MIKE MALLOY

THE UNKILLABLE MIKE MALLOY

THE MASSIVE TRAGEDY OF MADAME BOVARY

Southwark Playhouse Borough

★★★

“a high-spirited affair that the cast dive into with relish, commitment and enviable energy”

THE MASSIVE TRAGEDY OF MADAME BOVARY at Southwark Playhouse Borough

Reviewed on 9th December 2024

by Jonathan Evans

Photography by Tanya Pabaru

Previously reviewed at Southwark Playhouse venues:

THE MASSIVE TRAGEDY OF MADAME BOVARY

THE MASSIVE TRAGEDY OF MADAME BOVARY

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