“the perfect laugh-out-loud slice of silliness that we all need this year”
Seventy minutes. Seven classic pantomimes. Or is it six? We’re barely a minute in and there’s already an onstage dispute. Is ‘A Christmas Carol’ a pantomime? Daniel Clarkson and Jefferson Turner (hereinafter referred to as Dan and Jeff) differ on this matter. They don’t even agree to disagree; they just disagree. That is probably the closest you’ll get to cohesion in this insanely hilarious, outlandish, madcap romp through some our best loved Festive Fairy Tales.
Oh, no it isn’t!
Oh, yes… actually, that comes later, as do all the traditional principles: the double entendres, the slapstick, the booing and the hissing, the ‘ghost gag’, the songs. But the overriding ingredient in “Potted Panto” is the humour. Seventy minutes may be quite a short running time in a West End theatre, but it is a long time to laugh out loud. If you do go to see this show (and you most certainly should) then make sure you get in trim. Apparently we use thirty muscles when we laugh. You will need them all to be in top notch condition for this show.
Dan and Jeff are masters of the craft. As a double act they have perfected their comic timing, chemistry and intuitive sense of humour. They make old jokes new and new jokes sound like seasoned classics. Where others subvert the genre, they just completely capsize it. The kids love it without being patronised and the adults love it without having to dumb down. With Richard Hurst (who directs too) Dan and Jeff have concocted a script that is intensely intelligent and supremely silly.
‘Jack and the Beanstalk’, ‘Dick Whittington’, ‘Snow White’, ‘Sleeping Beauty’, Cinderella’, ‘Aladdin’ and ‘A Christmas Carol’ have barely a ten-minute time slot each. But it’s a wonder any of the storylines can be squeezed in amid the deviations, digressions and surreal tangents that the couple go off on. Jacob Jackson and Charlotte Payne appear in cameo roles occasionally, but otherwise it’s all down to Dan and Jeff. And Nicky Bunch’s offbeat costumes. In time honoured Vaudeville fashion, they pay homage to the likes of Morecambe and Wise, among others. Jeff is the (ever so) slightly more serious one, hopelessly trying to reign in Dan and teach him the intricate rules of Pantomime (“No, Dan, ‘Das Boot’ is not a traditional pantomime!”).
Where else on the stage can you experience theatre in 3D? Think about that one. Where else can Prince Charming get the chance to kiss three iconic Fairy-tale princesses in the space of half an hour? (Well – he actually doesn’t. In a very tongue-in-cheek nod to wokeness, our gallant Prince informs us that breaking into a sleeping girl’s bedroom with the intent to kiss her without consent is “not happening on my patch!”). How does Aladdin’s antagonist, Abanazer, end up being visited by the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future? This is just the tip of the iceberg. It is tempting to reveal the many, many other bizarre moments, topical jokes, cross references, cross dressing, character bending, plot twisting-until-its-snapping, in jokes, out jokes, shake-it-all-about jokes, visual puns, self-mockery, satire, innuendos… but I won’t.
Oh, yes I… (no – I won’t).
“Potted Panto” is the perfect laugh-out-loud slice of silliness that we all need this year. A must see for everyone. Especially for those who dislike (or pretend to) the genre. It is impossible not to love this show. It is seven stories for the price of one. And seventy minutes of unadulterated joy, which is priceless.
“There are quite a few pandemic jokes, and also pee and vomit jokes for all the boys in the audience—rapturously received”
Potted Panto, written by Daniel Clarkson, Jefferson Turner and Richard Hurst, is up at the Garrick Theatre in London’s West End this year. It premiered at the Edinburgh Fringe in 2010, and then transferred to London’s Vaudeville Theatre to much acclaim. It’s a lively two hander, directed by Hurst and starring Clarkson and Turner, with some additional help from the backstage crew. From the brilliant back and forth banter of the two leading men, to the suggestions of a set and quick change costumes, it is easy to imagine these actors barnstorming any variety show over the last one hundred years or so.
But traditional pantomime, this is not. The COVID-19 pandemic has seen to that. Audience and actor safety means that large casts have been mothballed, and performers socially distanced for the time being. Potted Panto’s small cast means less risk to the actors and audiences, though whether the Garrick Theatre, with its cramped nineteenth century proportions, is the ideal space, remains to be seen. Potted Panto’s approach doesn’t impact the number of characters, however. It keeps the title characters, while adding others in ways that are certainly creative, but distracting. (Abanazar Scrooge?) Prince Charming survives—although he turns up, and turns out, to be the same character whether he’s in Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Cinderella, or The Christmas Carol.
Panto needs a good plot, however, and Potted Panto’s overarching plot, for all the cleverness of the writing, is slender. It’s basically about two actors who want to do as many pantos as they can in seventy minutes. There’s a lot of comic material deftly presented as Clarkson and Turner go back and forth about what constitutes a genuine panto. (Spoiler alert: Sleeping Beauty counts, the Queen’s Christmas speech does not.) But because there are really only two performers, the actors have to do a lot of work arounds with the stories of the pantos that do make the list. Mostly these consist of exposition, and a lot of physical exercise, particularly on the part of Jefferson Turner, as he rushes on and off stage, changing costumes on the fly.
Potted Panto does have a lot of crowd pleasing moments. Adults, in particular, will enjoy the references to contemporary politics. To Clarkson, Turner and Hurst, Dick Whittington is really about a journalist who becomes Mayor of London and then prime minister, and a dishevelled blond wig is used to marvellous effect. There are quite a few pandemic jokes, and also pee and vomit jokes for all the boys in the audience—rapturously received. Clarkson and Turner are at ease with their audience, even when the response is a bit unexpected. The
actors make the most of opportunities to get audiences on their feet shouting “Oh no, he isn’t” and singing along. The handling of audience participation was particularly inspired as Turner picked on a good sport in the audience to be Prince Charming’s true love, and then just ran with it. (Hint: Cinderella is in for a bit of a shock.)
When all’s said and done with this seasonal offering, Potted Panto is likely to please adults more than the kids. There’s always some adult entertainment in even the most child friendly panto, of course, but Potted Panto edges more in the direction of the grown ups. Enjoy at your own risk.
