★★★

“a fun festive evening in the hands of an assured cast”

If you’ve ever wished that festive romcoms were stuffed with more innuendos, dance breaks, and maybe even a throuple, then Santa must have you on the nice list. Written by Neil Hurst and Jodie Pranger, Lovers Actually is a musical parody based on the 2003 film we all hate ourselves for knowing inside out. Your favourite bits are here (the gift wrap scene is taken to gasp-inducing new heights), and the boring bits are not (thankfully no sign of Colin whinging that British girls don’t like him).

An ominously large gift wrapped in a red bow flanks the stage on entry, but when the lights go up it turns out to be a giant advent calendar of sorts, with set pieces and props unfolding from the many doors. This does a solid job of taking us from Downing Street to Albert Square and everywhere in between in pursuit of happy endings for all our lovers, who you’re bound to be familiar with, even if you can’t remember any of the actual character names from the 2003 film.

Under Alex Jackson’s direction, the cast nimbly skip through the interweaving plotlines, each character in pursuit of a lover, with varying degrees of success and vulgarity. Louie Whitemore’s costumes are put through their paces, with a single blonde wig doing some heavy lifting to define three different characters, based on how jauntily the wig is placed. The actors bring the costume quick change mayhem to the audience for laughs too, along with solid musical performances and well-judged pantomime glances when props refuse to behave and the set disobeys them. It’s hard to pick favourites when we’re not just dealing with the original Love Actually character list, but additional meta versions of the characters based on the actors that played them. Joseph Beach is hilariously and unnervingly intense from the outset as Liam Neeson from Taken dropped into Liam Neeson from Love Actually’s story. And Holly Sumpton’s comic timing is stellar – her Emma Thompson made us cackle sooner than I would have thought possible after the final chords of Joni Mitchell’s Both Sides Now.

Lauren Hopkinson has reworked classic carols and the entirety of ‘Now That’s What I Call Christmas’ into raunchy new numbers, which Martha Pothen brings particular vocal accomplishment to. But some of the arrangements are just a bit long, and it hampers the show’s impressive laugh-per-minute rating. ‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ is the best of the bunch, with a crooning Bill Nighy (Joseph Beach) and his manager Joe (Ross Clifton) delivering pure joy (and jazz hands) ensuring every line brings a new laugh.

The script eventually becomes a victim of its own successes. There are some truly unexpected punchlines and digressions which are such fun rides that it’s actually disappointing to see the whole thing bookended by twee speeches from our Hugh Grant. The show is at its best when calling out the original script in ways we haven’t seen or heard before, and when the meta layering of characters reaches ridiculous heights.

Don’t go if you’re not ready to hear every single Christmas song ever released given a debaucherous twist. Do go if you’re looking for a fun festive evening in the hands of an assured cast, and you’re keen for something more grown up than a panto. This show is like a box of Celebrations – a few of the gags might not be to your taste, but gorging on the whole thing with a sing along is a merrymaking experience.

THE CREAKERS

Queen Elizabeth Hall

★★★★

“Gather up your kids and have a good time at The Creakers!”

The Creakers is a musical version of Tom Fletcher’s much loved children’s book of the same name. It’s about a group of kids who have to rescue their parents from a sinister world lurking below their beds. It’s a refreshing change from all the overly familiar panto fare on offer on London stages at the moment. As musical adaptations go, however, The Creakers fails to capture the magic of its original material. That’s not because it isn’t a talented production at the Queen Elizabeth Hall on London’s South Bank. But this version is a cautionary tale in how difficult it can be to adapt a brilliant story in book form, for the stage.

Set in Whiffington, a town with a waste disposal problem as its name suggests, The Creakers tells us about Lucy, a girl who is “different” though we are never told exactly how. Her single Dad is also the town’s rubbish collector, which adds to her problem of social acceptability. Most of the first act of the musical is about establishing the characters in the story, with frequent references to the social pecking order. There’s also a scandal brewing about the rubbish. The Mayor of Whiffington has decided to get rid of the overflowing rubbish by dumping it in the ocean. This is the inciting incident that sets the main story of The Creakers in motion. It turns out that a bunch of mysterious creatures called the Creakers depend on that rubbish for their food, building supplies, and even for their creativity. At night the Creakers emerge from under children’s beds, and feast on the mess and debris that kids (and their parents) have left lying around. Deprived of their sustenance, the Creakers take revenge by kidnapping the parents of Whiffington. Lucy and the kids have to figure out how to get them back.

It’s a good story, and it plays on childhood fears that everyone, child and adult alike, can identify with. The sustainability theme in the accumulating rubbish is a bit trickier, but from a staging perspective, it gives an imaginative set designer and costume designer lots to work with. Andrew Exeter and Ryan Dawson Laight take full advantage. But the rubbish is also a distraction from the main action. That’s Lucy’s goal of extracting the parents from the underground world of Woleb. (Yes, I figured it out.) And it takes the whole of the first act of The Creakers to get to the point where we finally meet these wonderful creatures, and the show takes off.

Despite the slow moving first act, and energetic songs that don’t always advance the action, The Creakers will succeed in winning you over by the end. The performers give their all to the many different roles they are called on to play, and that includes manipulating the puppet Creakers (designed by Lyndie Wright who knows everything there is to know about puppets.) Tom Jackson Greaves manages both the direction and choreography with flair in a space that is really a concert hall, and not a theatre. The small band produces a big sound with the superior acoustics of the QEH, and it was a treat to actually see them in the second act. Lucy (Eloise Davies) and her friends Ella (Iona Fraser) and Norman (Ally Kennard) are the main movers and shakers in the show but there’s a wealth of talent to see in minor roles all undertaken by a seamless ensemble.

If you’re wondering whether you can risk taking your child to a show that deals in accumulating rubbish and monsters lurking under the bed, have no fear. There’s a guaranteed happy ending. And no one will be surprised to discover that the Creakers are, in fact, the Save the Planet warriors we have been waiting for. As one satisfied customer remarked “I won’t have a nightmare tonight—I’ll have a funmare!” So ignore all the dramaturgical quibbling above. Gather up your kids and have a good time at The Creakers!

LOVERS ACTUALLY

The Other Palace

★★★

“a fun festive evening in the hands of an assured cast”

LOVERS ACTUALLY

The Other Palace

Reviewed on 26th November 2025

by Jessica Hayes

Photography by Pamela Raith

Previously reviewed at this venue:

LOVERS ACTUALLY

LOVERS ACTUALLY

LOVERS ACTUALLY

THE CREAKERS

Queen Elizabeth Hall

★★★★

“Gather up your kids and have a good time at The Creakers!”

THE CREAKERS

Queen Elizabeth Hall

Reviewed on 27th December 2024

by Dominica Plummer

Photography by Pamela Raith

Recently reviewed at Southbank venues:

THE CREAKERS

THE CREAKERS

THE CREAKERS

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